Fusion Ha!
by RDorothyW
Summary: Crack!fic. Hikaru and Kaoru discover a new level of closeness. [Not twincest]


**Edit: I didn't add to the story, just fixed some mistakes.**

This is really a crossover of OHSHC and Dragonball Z, but it's more anchored in Ouran so I just posted it here... Yeah, I know that sounds totally dumb, but if you read it you'll understand. : )

You'll probably want to know what the fusion dance is in order to read this. And I'm sorry in advance for the stupidness of this fic, but when I first thought of it, it was such a funny idea that I had to do it.

Disclaimer: I sorta took some phrases from DBZ, but I own neither that nor Ouran.

**Fusion Ha!**

"...And as for summer vacation, the king was very upset by the desertion of his loyal subjects! Next holiday, we shall..." Tamaki paused mid-speech, tilting his head and looking in the direction of the other members. They were all staring at Renge, seated at the far end of the meeting table, opposite Kyoya at the front. Her eyes were glued to a small, portable TV resting on the table in front of her. An upbeat theme song filled the music room, but Renge herself seemed oblivious to the distraction she was causing.

"Ah! Renge-chan, what are you watching?" Hunny inquired.

"In order to stay after for this reflection meeting, I would have missed my shows," Renge explained dramatically. "So it was necessary to bring this TV, in order to not miss this very important episode while also fulfilling my managerial duties!"

"No one said it was necessary for you to be here," Hikaru said dryly.

"It's actually more of a hindrance than a help," Kaoru added. The twins were up out of their seats and behind Renge a moment later, peering over her shoulder at the flickering screen.

"What's so important that you can't miss, anyway?" They asked in unison. "Huh? Dragonball... Z?"

"I thought you were obsessed with shoujo, Renge?" Tamaki asked, wondering why the very important matter of spending holidays as a family was being neglected in favor of a childish anime. Now the entire host club was gathered behind Renge, save Kyoya who was scratching away at a clipboard, and Tamaki, who was pouting.

"Why are you all ignoring me? This meeting is of utmost importance!" Tamaki cried piteously.

Haruhi sighed.

"The only purpose of these meetings is for you to hold us up longer, senpai," she said in Tamaki's direction. The president of the host club wilted beneath her gaze and crawled under the table.

"I do love shoujo the best," Renge continued, eyes still fixed on the screen, "but of course I cherish all anime and manga that has guys without shirts."

Tamaki suddenly appeared behind her, hand placed thoughtfully on his chin. On the TV, a green alien and a man with gigantic hair were instructing two young boys on a technique called "fusion". The two adults performed a strange series of movements while the boys watched.

"What on Earth is this about?" Haruhi asked.

"In order to save the world from evil, Goten and Trunks must fuse so that their combined powers can defeat the evil Majin Buu!" Renge exclaimed, quite theatrically. "They must learn and perform the fusion dance, making their bodies one, but this can only be achieved by posing in a certain way and being perfectly symmetrical to one another."

Hikaru and Kaoru exchanged looks.

"How immature!" Tamaki declared. "I find this outrageous! How can you watch this childish fantasy when we have important work to do?"

"It's not childish!" Renge turned around in her seat and pierced Tamaki with her evil otaku eyes. "Such a thing is perfectly realistic. It's just that no one in real life could ever be a perfect mirror of another. So stop talking badly about it!"

Light bulbs blinked to life over the Hitachiins' heads.

"Since Renge enjoys this anime 'Dragonball Z' so much, we will do the fusion dance for her," Hikaru said with a grin.

"And in exchange, Renge will promise to go home for the day and stop pestering the host club," Kaoru finished, leaning against his brother.

"Really?" Renge squealed, turning in her chair to the twins' direction. Her eyes shimmered with otaku love and Mori moved Hunny out of the way as a speck of froth from Renge's mouth nearly landed on the smaller boy's cheek.

"Sure," they shrugged and stepped back so they had room. The entire host club turned to watch, all looking bored and unamused, except for Renge who was squirming in her seat, and Hunny who was as wide-and-sparkly-eyed as usual.

Standing several feet apart, the twins nodded to each other and began, moving just as the spiky-haired man had instructed. They held their arms straight out away from each other and mirrored each other's movements.

"Fuuuuu--" Bending their knees, the two scuttled three steps toward each other, reaching out their arms in perfect unison. "-sion!" Raising their knees in a quarter turn and leaning in, their pointer fingers connected. "Ha!"

A blast of white light blinded the onlooking host club, flooding the previously calm music room with what seemed like the power of a thousand suns. Startled cries filled the air as the watching teens stumbled backwards in shock, shielding their eyes with their arms. The light subsided and Haruhi was the first to recover and produce a horrified gasp.

Between the spots where Kaoru and Hikaru had stood just moments before, there was now only one confused Hitachiin, hair parted perfectly down the middle. He blinked and looked around.

"H-Hikaru?" Tamaki asked, aghast.

"No," Hunny said, wiggling out of Mori's protective grasp. "It's Kaoru."

"They... fused," Kyoya said, amazed.

"Kyaaaa!" Renge cried, flying to her feet. "I told you! I told you it could happen!" The others ignored her outburst. All they could do was stare in disbelief at the solitary sibling that stood before them, who was carefully touching his face and running his fingers through his hair. He blinked stupidly at the rest of the host club.

"I guess Hikaru and Kaoru really _were_ the perfect mirror to each other," Tamaki said, wide-eyed. Haruhi cautiously walked forward and put her hand on Hikaru's-- or Kaoru's--- HiKaoru's-- shoulder.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "How do you feel?"

The twins' fused form blinked at the stunned girl, and slowly smiled.

"Actually," he said in a flawless combination of Hikaru's more masculine voice and Kaoru's softer one, "It feels perfect."


End file.
